Will nobody think of the bears?

[glenatron]

So today I wrote a song. Usually I spend ages working on lyrics until they are absolutely perfect but this one came pretty much straight from my brain to the page, pausing only at my guitar.

That would be fine, only I am completely unable to judge whether it's quite good in a slightly naive and bless way or if it is the kind of song that Phoebe would write. Normally I've got a lot of faith in my writing abilities (as life_of_tom will verify) but I have a definite suspicion this one might just be fairly dire. I'll hide the lyric away behind a cut so that you can ignore it or give it a look if you feel so inclined and tell me whether or not I should burn it...


Polar Bears

There’s been some bad weather for polar bears
I hear that more is on the way
If you keep turning up the thermostat
Eventually someone has to pay
They’re just a little bit ahead of us
We’re not so far back in the queue
So bad weather for polar bears
Is bad weather for me and you

It’s been a good year for hurricanes
They’ve found themselves some brand new homes
When your roof has gone it’s easier
To tell which way the wind blows
It’s been a good year for forest fires
They burn with a passion and a flame
The water we’re taking to put them out
It isn’t falling back as rain

Chorus:
How’s the weather holding out for you?
Is it sunshine is it rain?
It hasn’t snowed here in England
Since I don’t remember when

It’s been a bad time for commuters
Each year the roads just seem more full
Hum along with the air conditioning
It’s getting harder to stay cool

How’s the weather holding out for you?
Is it sunshine is it rain?
It hasn’t snowed here in England
Since I don’t remember when
It’s starting to get hot in here
And I’m starting to get scared
That no-one’s making air conditioning
To help the polar bears

Comments

Re: Laid Beaver

[glenatron.livejournal.com]

Arse, now I'm anonymous too...

Re: Laid Beaver

[shiva-matimbres.livejournal.com]

it snowed on the beach last year, we built a snowman on the beach

as to the lyrics, they're pretty cool, but you forgot the penguins and the other end of the world

Re: Laid Beaver

[glenatron.livejournal.com]

I don't care about penguins. Penguins are for losers.

Re: Stinky Beaver

[(Anonymous)]

I've seen Penguins at the equator. They'll be fine. I've seen pictures of them surfing too, and it's not far from their house to Australia, they can all go there. Sorted.

As for the man from the Zoo...well...are you sure he's the best authority on complex climatic issues? Also if the north atlantic conveyor belt does pack up and stop conveying then we could have polar bears here! Wow. They could hunt for people by smashing through the roof and pulling them out.

Do you think that there are no polar bears in the south because there were more of them in the north and sometimes they got too close to each other and the forces of attraction made the zoom together at high speed until they collided and turned into splatter-goo? Eventually leaving only the ones in the north there and the dead-sea in the middle which is made entirely of salty bear remains?

A song about a snowman that lived in a sand castle...that might be interesting too.

Re: Stinky Beaver

[(Anonymous)]

Not necessarily the climate expert, but a good authority to talk about what will happen if current trends continue, perhaps?

There used to be polar bears that migrated from one poll to the other to catch the best of the snow, but in the end they were just a bit too bipolar to get by.

I don't think snowmen live in sandcastles often. I was going to suggest they lived in igloos but that would be a bit grotesque now I come to think of it, like a person living in a house made of human flesh...